Friday, May 8, 2009

What I Want

I while back I watched the movie "The Women". I would give it a D+. Terrible acting. However, one part I liked. Meg Ryan is contemplating the fact that she has spent most of her life attending to other people and has forgotten about herself. She makes a "What I Want" board, and fills it with things representing what she wants for herself and her life.

I thought about that board for a while. In the movie, Meg Ryan's character felt like she had given up on herself and was trying to reclaim a bit of her identity. Wouldn't you agree that most moms feel like that from time to time. (Or all the time.)

I wouldn't say that I am a subscriber to the concept that you can "have it all". I personally couldn't have a career and be the mom I want to be. For me, it just isn't possible. Sometimes sacrifices have to be made, especially when you have small children. That doesn't mean that all dreams have to be forgotten. They just have to be placed somewhere else in your life. Or sometimes they do have to be forgotten. Sometimes choosing one lifestyle rules out another.

I have been working on my own "What I Want" board. I have it in my master closet where I can see it often. I currently am the soul resident of the master closet. That in itself is one dream come true. :) My board is a combination of larger long term goals and much smaller desires. Some are 20 years in the future, some 6 months. For me, they are things that I want. Things that I don't want to forget about during this chaotic time in my life. For some reason, just having them up makes me feel like they are more in my grasp. I won't forget about things that are important to me. Some of my basic goals for success are listed in the bottom left corner as well.

The second photo has numbers so if you are interested, you can see what each photo represents.
1. Dream house. Shane and I have been designing a home together for a while now. Shane was studying to be an architect in college...until he found out the average salary for an architect:) He switched fields, but still likes designing on the side.
2. Big bedroom with huge windows and a very fresh, clean feel. No toys on the floor. An incredible mattress. Fresh flowers on the side table.
3. Live in Europe for a year. Ideally when children are still at home.
4. Always have fantastic birthdays. (This was the cake Shane got me for my 30th.)
5. Have friendships that last my whole life.
6. Romance always.
7. Become a great cook.
8. Fantastic family vacations.
9. Get some chanel eau fraiche perfume and body lotion. My favorite scent, but currently not in the budget.
10. Dye my hair red. This was the photo I took to my stylist a few years back and I came out with this exact style. I LOVED it. So did Shane. I would like to do it again soon.
11. Christmas in Spokane as often as possible.
12. Romantic vacation to France with Shane. Within the next 5 years hopefully.
13. While I do like the purse pictured, this represents making my own money. Deciding to stay home with Lydia was the right decision for me, but that doesn't mean it wasn't a sacrifice. I liked working. I liked having my own income. I'm not sure what I want my career to be, but I know I haven't given up on one.
14. Always have great style that is my own. Sexy, classic yet comfortable.
15. Have a yard filled with hydrangeas.
16. A NEW CAMERA. This is the most pressing of everything on this list. I NEED a new camera. I think about it every day. I need a new computer along with PhotoShop as well, but for right now the camera is number one priortiy.
17. The "Natalie" was taken from a joint birthday card from my friends. It represents always having a good group of girlfriends and frequent girls night out. (Had one last night actually...)
18. I would like to feel comfortable in a bikini again. The last time I wore one was on a (very) private beach with Shane. It was our 4th anniversary. I got pregnant with Lydia that week. That may explain why I haven't felt quite so comfortable since. Not that I would actually wear a bikini, but I would like to know that I could.
19. Cruise with Shane, September 2010. That is the goal. I will be done nursing and we will be able to leave the kids with Grandma. Think I can get a bikini body by then?
20. Girls vacation! Maybe one with my sisters. Maybe one with my friends. I just know, I would love one.
21. Relaxing summer afternoons this summer with family. I have lots of family visiting this summer and I want to enjoy it. (Photo is of my favorite herbal ice tea.)
22. Always the most important element of my life. My family.
23. One of my favorite quotes: "When I was growing up, I always knew I'd be a mother. It was a big defining dream to be able to raise and adore a child. One of the challenges of my grown-up life is to keep feeding the part of myself that thinks big thoughts, to keep feeling wonder about who I can be, beyond a diaper-changing, runny-nose-wiping love machine. Amazing things happen when you commit with your heart and soul."
Stacy Morrison - Editor-in-chief of Redbook

So that is my current "Want" board. What would be on yours?


Meg said...

This is actually a really good idea. I have a 101 goals in 1001 days but this I want board seems to be less of a task and more of a reminder.

I've recently become a single mom and realized that I did so much caring for my ex and raising our son(not that I minded that part) but I lost myself. Now its a project to find me.

glenna said...

Very good idea.
What would be great:

making an board every 5 years....

stopping by from SITS

House Queen said...

What an awesome idea! I will work on one when school is out and post about it! Thanks for sharing!

Natalie "The Pampered Mom" said...

I love this idea ... i think i'll make one ... right after I make a list of all the things that need to be done before baby gets here!!

Hannah said...

Your post came at a wonderful time for me! Thank you for the great idea.

Emily said...

what an incredible idea! I really want to do something like this... thanks for sharing your want board!

Are You Serious! said...

♥ I thought that was the best part of the movie too! :)

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