Collin is going through a phase where he wants nothing to do with anyone but me. He will go to Shane if I am around, but if I leave, he tends to have a breakdown. He won't even take the breast milk I leave. All of the sudden I can't go to the gym (screams in the child center) and girls night out is becoming a thing of the past. I am starting to feel a bit trapped. It doesn't help that Collin's sleep habits seem to be regressing and I am averaging about 4 hours of sleep a night. I am so tired, it literally hurts.
Last night I nursed Collin, thinking of the piles of laundry to fold and dishes waiting to be washed. I had been so stressed the entire day and I'm not sure I had even brushed my teeth. Dreading the work that was still ahead of me, I looked down at Collin, who had pulled away from my breast. His eyes searched mine and I could see his perfect adoration. We watched each other while the rest of the world fell away.
What I keep on telling myself is that this is a very short time of my life. Freedom will come again. Sleep will come again. For now, I am trying to enjoy being the most important person in the world to this precious little child. It is an incredible gift to be so completely and utterly loved.
Thank you for the photo Kristi.