The Best Valentine treat EVER.

Oh wow. I am not a huge brownie person, but I finally got around to making Ina Garden's Outrageous Brownies this week. Chocolate Bliss. This recipe makes enough to feed an entire classroom. Or 20 REALLY hungry adults. I switched the unsweetened chocolate for bittersweet chocolate to sweeten them just a little more.

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Speaking of sugary goodness.....A couple weeks ago I was at the OB/GYN for a routine pre-natal visit. I had been waiting in the exam room for a while when my doctor's nurse rushed into the room looking angry. "Why haven't you been to see the high risk doctor yet?!" she asked with alarm. I looked at her for a moment and then calmly answered. "Why exactly would I need to see a high risk doctor?". The nurse stared at me, recomposed herself and said "I will go get the doctor to speak to you."

Hum. That didn't sound good.

A couple weeks previously I had been exposed to the parvovirus (also known as fifth disease). Lydia had it, but she didn't show symptoms until she was already past the contagious period. Fifth disease is no big deal for those who have it. Just like a cold with a rash. Unfortunately, it has very serious complications for pregnant women, and more importantly, their unborn babies. I was tested for immunity and received a cheery message from a nurse that all came back back fine and that I didn't need to worry about it. Apparently she had misread the results. I had a lot to worry about.

As the doctor discussed things like heart failure, brain swelling and anemia- I was grateful a friend has offered to watch Lydia during my visit and I was kicking myself that I didn't ask Shane to come with me. The doctor made an appointment to get me into the high risk doctor and calmly assured me that all of this was most likely just a precaution. I smiled and keep my cool.

I called Shane to update him on the situation. I again stayed cool as did he. No reason to worry until we knew more.

On my way home I realized I need to grab something for lunch so I turned into the local grocery store. I grabbed a few things and walked into the bread aisle. There I saw a box of Entenmann's Family pack donuts. Every time I go grocery shopping I look at that box and am tempted. For years I have walked past. This time I grabbed the box and threw it into my cart. There was a large women shopping next to me, grabbing a similar product. She was walking briskly back to the motorized shopping cart that she had been driving around the store.

I was in a huge hurry as I already was much later than I told me friend I would be. I rushed to the checkout lane, but the scooter lady beat me there. I watched her ever so slowly try to put the food onto the belt without actually standing up. I asked her if she would like any help, and she looked at me as though I had horribly insulted her. "No! I can do it." ----Well, duh. I knew she could do it. I saw her basically running in the cookie aisle, but apparently now she was crippled.

After 10 minutes or so, she was finally checked out. Sweetly she asked the checkout girl "Could you be a dear and help me out with my groceries?" My mouth dropped, as did the checkout girls. There was a huge line of shoppers waiting and this was obviously not part of the service this store provided. "Um, I will have to find someone to do that for you." the confused girl finally replied. Then she left. I could see her aimlessly walking around the store, looking for anyone free.

As I watched this shopper, perfectly content to cause so much needless delay, I could not stop all the pent up emotion from welling up and spilling over my checks. I rammed my sunglasses over my eyes, tore the Entenmann's donuts open and shoved half a white power donut into my mouth.

It is amazing how fast comfort food can work. I immediately felt better. Driving home I felt the baby react to the sugar and I was overwhelmed by fear for his well being. I crammed a huge chuck of a chocolate doughnut in my mouth. It tasted exactly like wax, but it was fat and sugar and it was hitting my bloodstream at record speed, so I finished it quickly.

By the time I got home I was working on my third donut and my suede jacket was completely covered with power and chocolate crumbs. I keep my sunglasses on to hide my swollen eyes.

That day I had five donuts. Five. I didn't even feel guilty. I only wished I had picked up some funyuns to go along with them.

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Update. I am seeing the high risk doctor weekly now. So far the baby seems to be fine. The doctor is hopeful that within 8 weeks we will know for sure either way. I feel pretty good that all will be well. Prayers on his behalf are always welcome. - I like my new doctor. He is really handsome and charming which pairs nicely with his Spanish accent. I feel like I am on the set of Grey's Anatomy when I see him. His office is gorgeous. Even his nurse is incredibly attractive. (Shane verified that for me.) I would normally play along and imagine I am the stylish and mysterious patient, but Lydia having an "accident" in the exam room kind of breaks scene.