Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Why I'm Festive

I'm a housewife. As much as I detest that title, that's what I am. (I have an idea for a better term here.) I'm a stay at home mom. A homemaker. Most of the time I love it. I love that I get to stay home with my darlings and be a part of this precious time in their lives. I like creating a home.

But here's the honest truth. Sometimes it is mad boring. Maybe boring isn't the right word. Exhausting and mind numbing? Sometimes the days run together into a mad dash of clean up one room- walk into the next and find it a disaster-cook breakfast-clean dishes-"Collin, please don't cry, I just want to take a 3 minute shower"-cook lunch-clean dishes-play Candyland-change diapers- find baby food all over my jeans - get spit up down my bra- run to the grocery store- nurse-cook dinner- clean dishes- "please don't splash water all over mommy"-storytime- one more kiss and hug.....collapse into bed....

All that mommy stuff I do is important. It's what makes our family work. But 20 years down the road, I'm not going to remember how clean the house was or what I made for lunch. That doesn't make it any less important. All the things we do as mothers helps with the development and well being of our children.

We aren't going to remember most of these things in 20 years. What are we going to remember? Christmas. Birthdays. The Valentine Lady. Summer BBQs in the backyard. Family vacations. Easter Egg hunts. Fourth of July writing in the air with sparklers. When my children look back at their lives, I bet they will think about what made the special days special. I may not remember many Wednesday night dinners as a child, but I remember every Christmas. I remember Halloween. I remember Sunday dinners because Sunday dinners were always special.

Day after day, 99% of us do the same thing over and over. We care for children or sit in our offices and we do the things that are required of us. A few times a year there are days that stand out. Days of celebration. An anniversary, Father's day, Halloween. These are days that break up the monotony. If it isn't your particular inclination to make them a bit deal, that is totally fine. But for those of us who do want to celebrate, it isn't an affront. It isn't to make anyone feel bad about not participating in the celebrations. It is just something some of us do to bring more joy into our life.

Celebrating life. Maybe that is my thing. I love birthdays. I love that there is a day totally dedicated to celebrating someone's birth. My children's birthdays are going to be special. However they want them to be. I love Christmas. I love the smells that remind of childhood stories around the tree. I love Halloween and the glee of a home filled with spooky decor and giggling at silly costumes. I love all of it. It isn't extra stress to me. It is a de-stresser. A relief from the everyday.

When I mentioned to a friend that I wanted to throw a birthday party for Lydia, she said "You know, Lydia really is too young to remember these Birthdays". That's true. But she will remember always feeling loved. The traditions will become a part of her. And as parents we don't always do things for our children so they will remember them. Sometime we do it so that we as parents can remember the utter joy and happiness displayed on our sweet children's faces. For me, those memories alone are worth the trouble.


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Speaking of festive...next week I am hosting 4 Father's Day themed giveaways so make sure to check back everyday. Also, I have room for one more, so if you have a great Father's Day gift you would like me to consider, email me before Sunday.

Local? Don't forget to enter the Pleasant Vonnoh photo shoot giveaway!

13 comments:

Abby said...

I love that you are festive. You always have been. But don't apologize for "only being a house wife." You spend your days sacrificing and serving; sorry the world only admires a business suit and paycheck. You should be proud to be a "home-maker." Home is the most important place on the planet, and you "make" it.

kristi lee said...

Well said, Abby!! And who's messing with your festive thunder??? That's one of the things I most admire about you...make the ordinary feel anything but!

Natalie Jane said...

Oh, you wouldn't believe the emails I get about causing unrealistic expectations....


And I'm not apologizing for being a housewife :) I just don't like that term.

Kytsmom said...

It's interesting that you say all of this. My son's first birthday is in a few weeks. I want tomake paper lanterns and have kiwi drinks. Several people say "why? he's not going to know." And I say, yes, but I will and I want those happy moments to begin even before he can remember them. Thanks for the post!

Rachel said...

Very well said I love it. I love all the comments. People keep on calling us just a House wife as if we don't doing anything but just in and watch TV. The minute we try to spice things up we have someone say somethings like that. We can't win can we. Do your festive party and keep those memories going.

Amber Cullum said...

I am totally with you on celebration.

dougandcheryl said...

I agree with you so much. I am very festive too and am constantly trying to do new family traditions. People have often said to me that my daughter won't remember or that it's silly.. but I love it, she loves it, my husband loves it... and since I grew up with a festive mom those are the memories I have from my childhood- holidays and traveling.

Laura said...

Thanks I needed this today! I love love love birthdays...and any other celebration...I too always hear that they are too young...and I just want to say...you know those are my memories...so I guess at some point you stop being too young...and I mean what would they think if they never had a birthday party and then you throw one when they are "old enough" you're so right traditions...it makes us who we are!

Crystal said...

I can't believe you get nay sayers for wanting to throw birthday parties and have traditions and celebrations! I say celebrate! :)

bumblebeebags said...

unrealistic expectations? seriously? Isn't it our job as parents to fill our childrens life with as much fun and fantasty and joy as possible. I cant stand people like that. Realistically!! we only have very few years of magic with our kids before "reality" intrudes. You better damn well believe that I'm going to make those years as magical as possible!!!

Rachel said...

I think you are fabulous for being so festive don't let anyone steal your party thunder:0)
As for Lydia not being able to remember her birthday one of my most favorite memories was my 5th birthday when my Mom made me a 3 tiered lollipop cake that was bright pink. It's those little things that remind you just how much your Momma loves you that will always stick with you!

Modern Crush said...

I know, I have friends with kids who think about birthday parties and sigh that it is SOO much work and they are just so not into it. I hope I am not like that when I have kids. No matter how little money we had as kids, my parents always made it memorable. And now, I am 26. And I can testify that just like you hope for Lydia, I DO remember all those little things and remember that I am loved!!

I think its fair to say that lots of people are SO SO SO different than you or I, and that what goes for them should not have to be what goes for the rest of us. Some people just aren't into the planning and the fun.

And amen to things like this being de-stressing. I couldn't agree more!!

xo

Lisa Lew said...

I always have wonderful birthday cakes for my lovies. Why? Because when I was a little girl, my mom had the most wonderful cakes made for our birthdays. I don't actually remember the Big Bird party I had when I was 5 or the Holly Hobby birthday party I had when I was 6, but I do have pictures of me with the most beautiful cakes. And yes, I knew then as I do now, that I was very, very, loved.

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